What has helped? I have been incredibly fortunate to have the support of my husband's family and my own family. They have rallied round to do what they can. It has made me realise how resilient those who do not have access to a partner or extended family must be; and I have a greater sense of respect for them.
I have also coped by taking things slowly and being really clear about my priorities. This was critical because at one point I was getting wound up about the fact that I had not written the Christmas letter nor felt like doing it. As my Mum said I can always write a New Year letter, the world is not going to end without it. It's one day or even one step at a time.
Part of the go slow has meant listening to my body more. This has included caring for it by grabbing time to have a long soak in the tub - a novelty for me as Mum to two tots. It has also included going to bed early as I realise that all the emotional worry of the situation has made me more tired.
I also realised how important it is for everyone including coaches to have a coach. Part of the way that I heal is by having a good cry as a way of releasing all the pent-up emotions inside. I have found that family members are uncomfortable with all that whereas a good coach understands the process, shows compassion and just holds the space for you.
I do believe that everything that happens to us is an opportunity for learning. As one close family friend asked has this experience aged you to which I came back with a resounding yes. That aside I am grateful that I have such a supportive family and visiting my husband in hospital has reminded me what a great team we make and what I love about him. He has also received some much needed rest which has been difficult to take with a demanding job and two young children.